Allow me to get my Dangote on 2016: Alive & Well

The Return by The Blog Sensei Kempson Ari Jaffe Joffer

@ZambiazHarshTag Instagram: @zambiazhandel

“All the fresh styles always start out as a good little hood thing. Look at blues, rock, jazz, rap, not even talking about music. Everything else too.” - Andre 3000, Hollywood divorce.

By the time any novel thing goes through the cycle and reaches the main stream, it’s over. However, it’s all good because I’m already ahead of the curve being different again. 2015 saw the establishment of jesuislecritique.blogspot.com which in turn has cued some great opportunities in 2016. Aside from being @Curatezed 46, attending numerous events in solidarity and support of Zambian ascetics scene and various players in the craft, promoting international brands, and writing, I’m alive and well and the blog is not going anywhere.

I attended two out of the top 5 gigs I listed on my final post of 2015, the only two I was invited to go figure. At his last gig of 2015 and indeed his second last in Zambia before relocating to Germany, 

Eleftherios Mukuka @elmukuka New Year’s Eve gig at Sky Bar was stellar indeed. I sat at the bar in a solemn reflection of the previous 365 days as the house maestro played a splendid selection of tunes. It could have been the last day of life as I watched the reel of another twelve months of existence in my mind in the company of my solace. As with the cycle of life, there was not one friend in sight perhaps a few familiar faces I had met on my duties as a scribe, on that evening however it affirmed the banal, vulgar, bewildering, gratifying in essence the mundane phases of my existence that bore levity now condensed into a forgotten memory I grasped at like morning due to no avail.

What are those Dangote moments you ask? I read like an imbecile to enlightenment through winter, relived the fallacy of love and how feeble even those society and so-called culture holds in high esteem are in spring, the selfishness of man and how limitless I can be in summer, and discovered the few that actually care if I live during the festivities. What distracting contrasts living exposed me to, from the death of a juvenile twitter relationship, seeing one’s maternal mother prevail on her death bed, a perfect encounter made of dreams destroyed by the mocking clutches of time, running with will and purpose to feel like the legends from the stories of my youth, all in the past linking to a fading future in the present time I write. What frivolous times to exist I thought as Dj Switch @DjSwitchSA

jumped on the decks to play an impromptu set at 3am on the first day of 2016, of music only a real disc jokey of a certain epoch, a forgotten time on the party teams of days gone by. R&G @RandGzambia did it again, #WayToGo @DjSwitchSA, the anonymous ladies who kicked off 2016 with @ZambiazHarshTag I see you, and @FlyingFishSA who always #AddSomeFlavour.                

Besides me getting on Instagram as @Zambiazhandle Dangote is now officially a buzz word on these Lusaka and Zed nationwide streets, used to describe:

1.    A person with great financial abilities in the realm they exist.

2.    A female with a lot of talent in the booty expanse. “Ali na Dangote uja gelo”, “That girl has a serious Dangote”.

3.    An individual held in great reverence for their feats or an authority in a certain field.

*Breaths two breaths* “Back like I never left, I’m on my second breath.”    As with all things gully/trap/hood, before the mainstream vultures skirmish as they always do with hood novelty, allow me to get my Dangote on in 2016 and what a time it is to be alive and well.